Woodside School District

Find yourself guilty of over-parenting? It happens to the best of us even though we know how important
it is for our children to develop independence and resilience. We all want to protect our children from
harm and keep them safe. But when we overprotect and don’t allow our children to struggle, they miss
out on valuable opportunities to grow and develop life skills and confidence. Here are some helpful
articles on encouraging your child’s independence and resilience:

• This article addresses the challenge of knowing when to soothe your child and when to back up
  and let them learn to cope. 
  http://www.slate.com/articles/life/the_kids/2016/06/when_to_give_crying_kids_comfort_and_when_to_tell_them_to_buck_up.html

• We are hearing more and more about the importance of children developing grit and resilience.
  Here’s 20 strategies you can use to help your child develop resilience. 
  https://www.heysigmund.com/building-resilience-children/

• Explore curated collections of resources related to building the skills, mindsets, and necessary
  supports to help young people confront adversity, cope with challenges, and demonstrate
  perseverance to attain goals. 
• https://www.edutopia.org/resilience-grit-resources

• By middle school especially, much of this has to do with academics. Here’s a helpful article on how
  to encourage your middle-schooler to take ownership of their school work. 
  http://www.teachhub.com/how-increase-academic-independence-middle-school-students

• Last year local author Julie Lythcott-Haims came to Woodside School and discussed her best seller,
  How to Raise an Adult. Here are some helpful tips from Julie to guard against over-parenting. 
  https://ww2.kqed.org/mindshift/2016/01/05/overparenting-5-recovery-steps-from-a-former-stanford-dean/

• This article pulls from Julie’s book outlining what life skills children should be practicing at different
  ages.
  https://www.familyeducation.com/life/individuality/i-did-it-all-myself-age-age-guide-teaching-your-child-life-skills-0

And, don’t forget later this month we are fortunate to have parenting expert Laura Markham
present at our Common Ground Speaker Series. She will offer helpful guidance to provide
empathy and clear communication to raise a self-disciplined child. More info:   http://www.commongroundspeakerseries.org/speaker/laura-markham-phd/

And one more article about dealing with BTS anxiety:

Click HERE to find a curated list of blogs, articles, and videos for parents about fostering SEL skills like kindness, empathy, gratitude, resilience, perseverance, and focus in children (from Edotopia).

The term "bullying" is used a lot these days. But what type of behavior is truly considered "bullying"? We encourage you to read this article that focuses on this issue: What Bullying Is and Is Not.

Parents and schools need to work together to keep our children safe online and to teach them how to be respectful digital citizens in today’s complex world. Some advocates say the most important thing adults today can do for the next generation is to work in partnership with other parents and teachers to create a village of support when it comes to digital technology use. To that end, here are some links to help you and your child navigate all of this together safely and respectfully:

• In this article, Gloria Moskowitz-Sweet, Erica Pelavin and Mia Freund Walker — parents, clinicians and educators who are principals in www.mydigitaltat2.com — help you understand your teens and tweens and talk to them about being kind online and offline. 
  http://www.sfchronicle.com/opinion/openforum/article/Good-values-guide-kids-online-or-off-6864429.php

• Speaking of mydigitaltat2.org, this page has two worthwhile videos on digital citizenship as well as other links to helpful articles. http://www.mydigitaltat2.org/news.html

• This article, from commonsensemedia.org — a leader in the field of protecting children around media and online issues — gives parents concrete tips for raising a child with good morals and values. 
  https://www.commonsensemedia.org/blog/how-to-raise-a-kid-with-a-conscience

• Here’s a quick video from commonsensemedia.org to help you make rules with your child about his/her cell phone. 
  https://d1pmarobgdhgjx.cloudfront.net/review/PT-smartphone-rules-2016.mp4

• Here’s a great interview with an expert in this field who helps you understand your child and his/her attraction to social media etc. 
  https://www.huffingtonpost.com/hippo-reads/what-does-it-mean-to-be-a_10_b_8298890.html

• An article from NPR with a self-explanatory title: Real Parents, Real Talk About Kids And Screens
  https://www.npr.org/sections/ed/2016/12/06/496907205/real-parents-real-talk-about-kids-and-screens

• This link is designed for educators but has great, quick videos on digital citizenship that you can watch with your child to get the conversation started! https://www.educatorstechnology.com/2013/10/5-excellent-videos-to-teach-your.html?m=1

SEL, or Social Emotional Learning, is woven throughout the curriculum and hence the fabric of our community’s culture at Woodside as early as preschool. As our students move through the elementary and middle school grades, the program remains an important focus in the classroom. We believe it's one of the reasons our students not only thrive but also enjoy their time at school.

Maurice Elias, a Psychology Professor at Rutgers University and Director of the university's Social-Emotional Learning Lab, describes SEL as the process through which we learn to recognize and manage emotions, care about others, make good decisions, behave ethically and responsibly, develop positive relationships and avoid negative behaviors.

Most schools refer to this definition and while most parents would gladly accept their children developing all of those skills, there are even more benefits to SEL instruction in schools including increased academic performance, fewer behavioral problems, less emotional distress, and enhanced prospects for college attendance, employment, civic participation and life-long health.

You can see why the teachers at Woodside embrace SEL throughout our campus notwithstanding the fact that teachers with SEL skills are more likely to display higher job satisfaction as well. Many of our teachers were trained at Nueva’s SEL institute.

Here are some of the many ways that SEL is woven into the curriculum throughout our school:

• At Woodside, SEL teaches the skills students need to “know yourself”, “choose yourself”, and “give yourself”. These skills include recognizing and managing our emotions, developing caring and concern for others, establishing positive relationships, making responsible decisions, and handling challenging situations constructively and ethically. These skills allow children to calm themselves when angry, make friends, resolve conflicts respectfully, and make ethical and safe choices. At the monthly Wednesday line-up, students in the lower grades are presented with Paw of Praise certificates recognizing how they have positively implemented SEL practices.
• Teachers are encouraged to involve the children in creating classroom agreements and have regular “check-in’s” for identifying emotions, problem solving and conflict resolution.
• Teachers discuss “expected and unexpected” behaviors and encourage children to use their social toolboxes to figure out how to solve problems.
• Teachers often choose literature with social and emotional themes that encourage classroom discussions and incorporate SEL themes into their on-going lessons.
• Mindfulness, breathing techniques, and deescalating strategies are reviewed with children regularly.
• Middle schoolers’ Open Session focuses on SEL skills such as conflict management with peers, family, and teachers as well as appreciating differences, managing stress with prep for high school, and guided meditation.
• Buddy benches (a place for children to sit when they need a friend) on campus encourage inclusion and open expression of emotions.

We all want our children to do their best academically in school. When emotions are brought to the forefront in classrooms, children are more at ease and better able to focus and attend to their studies. Learning how to manage emotions and solve problems are skills we all need throughout life. SEL at Woodside creates better students and better human beings today and tomorrow.  

Additional Resources:

http://www.instituteforsel.org/why-sel
https://emsofl.com/blog/four-major-benefits-socialemotional-learning/
https://www.edutopia.org/social-emotional-learning-history

If you have any questions regarding the SEL program at Woodside School, please contact SEL leads Lindsay Pierce and Bev Iverson or Tom Limbert.

For many parents, the holiday season can be a beyond-busy season. It brings a mixture of excitement and trepidation — so much to do, so little time. There is a good reason that “hustle and bustle” and “Christmas rush” are our culture’s December colloquialisms. An unwanted add to our stress is that our children pick up on the adult energy around them and they too can feel frazzled. Practicing mindfulness is one simple way to settle our minds and tend to our hearts as we approach the winter holidays. 
 
Mindfulness gives us a way to take a brief “time out” from the list making, worry, and the frantic state that too often goes hand in hand with holiday preparations and celebrations. While there are many definitions for mindfulness, I tend to think of it as clearing your mind of distractions and directing your attention to the here and now, without judgment. 

When we are mindful, we are more calm and can achieve clarity. Research shows that regular mindfulness practice can help to reduce stress, enhance concentration, improve memory and support overall well-being. One of the easiest ways to introduce children to mindfulness is by teaching them the power of their breath. While there are many tools we teach students related SEL, the breath is the most primary and effective way of self-regulating. Taking a deep breath, as simple as it may seem, may be one of the most valuable lessons that we can both learn and teach.

“Belly Breathing” is Key (aka Diaphragmatic breathing)
Diaphragmatic breathing, abdominal breathing, belly breathing or deep breathing is breathing that is done by contracting the diaphragm, a muscle located horizontally between the thoracic cavity and abdominal cavity. Air enters the lungs and the belly expands during this type of breathing.This type of breathing is crucial in order for breathing to help calm the body and mind. Belly breathing contrasts the rapid, shallow breathing we tend to do when tense or anxious. 

How to Breathe with Your Diaphragm 
Lie down on your back on a comfortable surface or on the floor with a pillow under your knees. Place a book on your abdomen, near your belly button, or place one of your hands on your belly. (For younger children, you might try using small stuffed animal in place of a book.) As you inhale, allow your stomach to push against the weight of the book. The book (or stuffed animal) should lift with the inhalation. As you exhale, allow the pressure of the book to push your stomach in. Continue to exhale and let your stomach fall until you have expired the air. Repeat for a few minutes or up ten minutes. Allow the air to flow evenly and slowly. Remember to breath slowly and if your attention drifts, bring it back to observing your breath and the movement of the abdomen.